Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Two in the morning

Punk and her mister scramble into a bed layered with blankets. The sheet is cold, and the mister grumbles and curls into a fetal position. Punk squinches her numb feet between his calves.

Punk: You know what we should have?

Mister: Sex?

Punk: ...Okay. No, what I was going to say was that it would be great if we had one of those old-fashioned heat iron thingies, like from Little House on the Prairie. It would warm up the bed before we have to get in it.

Mister: No. Maybe an electric blanket?

Punk (shuddering at the thought): Uh, which would get used like five nights of the year? Not to mention how I would be sweating at three in the morning, and then there would be anger and fighting in the middle of the night.

Mister (considering the fighting and anger in the middle of the night): ...Yeah. It probably wouldn't be very good for us. I guess not.

Punk: And by "good for us," you mean our marriage as a whole, right?

Mister: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....

Punk: Chahead.


  1. ROFL!!! Poor guy got my sleeping genes...except though I fall asleep FAST...I do not sleep like a ROCK like some people. Aren't those "heat iron thingies" filled with coals from the fire? That would take some serious planning. We have the blanket, warm the bed with it and shut it off when we climb in. Snug as a bug in a warm rug. zzzzz

  2. It's funny I often wish I had a foot warmer thingy. Only I don't think of Little House I think of Anne of Green Gables.

    Also if my mister were suggesting sex at 2am I'd assume he was talking in his sleep and tell him to roll over and be quiet.

  3. Oh, men. And Al-Qaeda thanks you for helping spread their message of terror.